Easter Bunny etiquette

At our Easter brunch we were seated at a cozy country club setting with about 200 other people, all seemingly intent on eating as much from each food group as possible and from a few food groups not yet recognized by nutritionists ("cheesecake").

The Hero is still, several days later, talking about the Boston cream pie donut. Smothered in chocolate on the outside and dripping with cream inside, it took up almost his entire plate. The prudent thing to do would have been to share with all the other patrons, or at least those at our table. But enormous Boston cream pie donuts do not come along every day. So we did not do the prudent thing, and instead greedily consumed it together.

Of course, a donut was not the first thing we ate. Possibly if it had been, there would have been no need to eat anything else that day, or for several days afterward.

But first there were omelets to be conquered, and breakfast baked goods. One Young Person in our party came to the table with a plate laden with the latter, and hastened to assure his mother that he and his sister were sharing. He neglected to say that they were sharing not only his plate but also hers, which was just as laden.

Somewhere between the Boston creme pie donut and a second visit to the dessert bar -- where resided the glorious cheesecake -- the Easter Bunny made an appearance. The Hero, anticipating that our table would be graced by the bunny's presence, wondered aloud what constitutes proper conversation with the Easter Bunny.

We all ruminated on this question between bites, until one Relative offered, "Hoppy Easter?"

Seeing the Easter Bunny brought back fond memories of the days when my mother took me to sit on the lap of a human-sized rabbit and smile for the camera. I know this is a fond memory because in the photo that was taken, my arms are outstretched to, presumably, my mother -- the one who supposedly loved me unconditionally, with every fiber of her being -- and I am crying my eyes out and screaming. No doubt I am saying, "I'll be in therapy for this someday!"

There are no further existing photos of me and the Easter Bunny. Perhaps he entered therapy directly after my visit and was advised to go into another line of work.

It turns out that we were spared having to say anything to the present-day Easter Bunny by his abrupt disappearance from the dining room. A shame he didn't stay for the Boston cream pie donut and cheesecake. But then, we didn't leave much behind for him.