The chick inn

It can be tough finding a responsible party to look after your urban chickens when you want to get away for an occasional weekend or so. You might be lucky enough to find a chicken-sitting service, consisting of an individual who comes to your place to feed the chickens, make sure they're comfortable, keep an eye out for any neighbors who might be hungry, etc.


Or, you might be able to take advantage of a new solution: 

Comfortable suite available nightly in convenient urban location, plus meals, for two dollars. Deluxe accommodations -- including organic meals and turndown service -- for dollar extra. Will only consider patrons who:

-- Are about a foot tall

-- Get around mostly by waddling/strutting

-- Communicate largely through clucks

Yes. The chick inn.

A slight catch is that not too many chicken hotels exist in the US as of yet. Like: 1. But the idea is bound to catch on, and each establishment is likely to offer its own personalized services. There might be, say, a Basic Level (clean food and water, a comfortable roost), a Deluxe Level (thick, luxurious towels; privacy curtains), a Deluxe Deluxe Level (a fluffy pillow with a small chocolate on top), and a Queen Super-Deluxe Almost-Human Level (with penthouse suite, food pellets provided on a silver tray, dance lessons, etc.).

Here are a few suggestions for those who might be considering opening such an establishment:

-- Have some toys on hand in case the chickens need a little entertainment. If you are wondering what sorts of toys might interest chickens, basically it comes down to, according to one source, "food and shiny things." 

-- Some hens may experience a bit of anxiety over going to sleep in an unfamiliar place. You might play a soothing selection of lullabies to help patrons nod off to sleep. 

-- In severe cases of homesickness, owners should be encouraged to provide pictures of themselves that can be shown to the hens to help them feel more at ease. Maybe a special blanket, even.

As with any establishment that serves the public, a few rules will help keep things running smoothly:

-- No visitors of the opposite sex.

-- No lights, food, or shiny things past 9:00.

-- No scary movies before bedtime (anything having to do with Thanksgiving is strictly forbidden).


This post has been approved by the the Federation of Urban Fowl (FUF). Pending approval by the Campaign for Licensed, Unvexed Chicken Kare (CLUCK).