Dear Mr. Bug Guy,
I have read your information online about cave crickets, those delightful creatures that look like a cross between a mutant spider and a grasshopper, or a shrimp and a grasshopper, depending on the particular type, and can leap over sofas and tables and washing machines and refrigerators with no effort whatsoever. Having discovered several of these creatures in my home and workplace, I heartily concur with your observation that "cave crickets often startle residents who discover them in the basement." Perhaps, though, this observation does not go far enough. "Startles them into life-threatening heart palpitations" is, I think, not too strong of a description of what happens when you find one of these things.
You also state that cave crickets are "harmless." Perhaps you and I have differing understandings of the word "harmless." If I, upon discovery of such a creature in my home, scream, leap over the end table and knock a lamp to the floor, destroy four pairs of my husband's shoes from trying to hit the intruder, then create large holes in the walls and floors from repeated attempts to hit it with a 2 x 4, is it still considered "harmless"?
Thank you for your reassurance that cave crickets are "disinclined to mate indoors unless under damp, dark conditions." Until I read this, I confess it did not cross my mind to wonder whether cave crickets were mating in my basement. Now I have a new thought to keep me up at night, along with my new-found knowledge -- thanks also to you -- that these creatures will eat their own limbs to avoid starving, and that although they are theoretically edible, they probably "don't taste very good due to their diet," which may included canine feces. No doubt the thought of MOST people upon discovering a cave cricket in their dwelling is "Can I have this for dinner?" You have obviously saved a great number of us from the dire consequences of our curiosity.
I am encouraged by your advice that I can get rid of these creatures by eliminating the "dark, damp conditions they prefer" and creating a "clean, dry home." I have already begun this process, and my efforts to make our home less hospitable for cave crickets are paying off. We have seen a marked decline in their numbers. There is just one problem. In order to create a "clean, dry home," I have eliminated everything in the house except a few old newspapers, in case we see any more cave crickets. What do we do now?
Sincerely,
Cave Cricket Vanquisher
2 comments:
Dear Cave Cricket Vanquisher,
Just a note to let you know that you are not alone in your feelings about cave crickets. (I never had seen one until I moved here.) Mr. Nosy Neighbor was away on a business trip late last week, when The Horrible Little Animal (Kat)who had been sitting on my lap, suddenly looked focused (this happens so rarely) and jumped off of my lap, ran across the room, and was obviously stalking something that ran for a crevice in the stone wall of the wood stove surround. When my heart stopped pounding, I went to look at the opening and saw what were obviously cave cricket legs sticking out. I got Mr. Nosy Neighbor's slippers and started pounding, which caused the cricket to move further into the hole. To make a long story short, there is now a long piece of duct tape over that hole which I am afraid to remove...
You were very wise to use Mr. Nosy Neighbor's slippers as opposed to your own, because then you obviously would have had to get a new pair. As for the duct tape, well, I would leave its removal to Mr. Nosy Neighbor.
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