Performance evaluation

A book I'm editing right now talks about teacher evaluation. It reminds me how glad I am that I'm not a teacher anymore, with all that angst about being observed and rated and maybe being sent to time-out for not doing a good enough job.

But of course people in other professions get evaluated too. And I suddenly realized that, because I work at home and am my own boss, I don't.

So I decided that, as my own boss, I can give myself a performance evaluation. Some of you may protest that such a review would inevitably be biased, to which I say "pffft." (One of the many perks of working for yourself, besides giving yourself biased performance reviews, is being able to say "pffft.")

So, here are the results of my performance evaluation:

1. Procrastinates starting work: Exceeds expectations
2. Multitasks and manages time creatively (does laundry, readies dinner, runs errands, etc., while working): Outstanding
3. Dresses appropriately (by at least 3 p.m.): Meets her very low expectations
4. Uses workspace creatively by moving work materials to the couch, bed, etc.: Above average
5. Communicates effectively (through e-mail chats with friends, phone conversations with strangers, discussions with self, the mailman, etc.): Jolly good
   
6. Sets priorities (e.g., in deciding whether to have a hot chocolate break now or later): Needs improvement (should have a hot chocolate break now AND later)
   
7. Able to independently utilize resources in the refrigerator and cupboard: Superior

Not bad for a first-timer. As a reward, maybe I'll give myself a raise. Or at least another trip to the refrigerator.