Today we bring you a few select Proverbs updated to reflect modern experience.
- He who answereth before listening...more easily getteth rid of telemarketers.
- People curseth the man who hoards grain...and also he who buyeth up all the batteries and bottled water before a snowstorm.
- Better to live on a corner of the roof...if the cell phone reception is better there.
- All hard work bringeth a profit...which the government soon taketh away.
- If you falter in times of trouble...State Farm is there!
- Grandchildren are a crown to the aged...children, not so much.
- Iron sharpeneth iron...and produceth a noise that no one can standeth.
- A man findeth joy in giving an apt reply...but if the woman only wanted him to listen, he replieth in vain.
- Many are the plans in a man's heart...which are soon derailed by his wife and children, particularly on the weekend.
- Of what use is money in the hand of a fool...when it would be MUCH better off with me?
- There is a way that seemeth right to a man...but his wife will set him straight.
- He who listeneth to a life-giving rebuke...has turned off his hearing aid.
2 comments:
I KNOW the last one was written with Mr. Nosy Neighbor in mind. For a price, I won't tell him...
Loved these, by the way.
Well, I'm not sure it was WRITTEN with him in mind, but he certainly CAME to mind during the writing. As did a certain uncle of mine, who I always wondered, when I was younger, how he could be so serene amidst all the hullaballoo at family gatherings.
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