Q & A II

Q: Dear Prissy Princess,
My spouse insists on bringing up important topics for discussion at inopportune moments, such as when I am asleep. What do you recommend?
-Asleep and clueless

A: Dear Clueless in ZZZsville,
You did not say whether your spouse is a man or a woman, although I suspect it is a man. This is because a woman would have read all the marriage how-to books and know how important it is that she have her spouse's full attention when broaching matters of importance so that the two can discuss the topic rationally without distractions. Of course a man knows, without reading the books, that if he does this the discussion will never result in any favorable outcome for him, and therefore he chooses to talk with his spouse when she cannot actually participate in the conversation. From his point of view, she is much more likely to agree with something he proposes, such as purchasing a new Ford Super Duty pickup truck today, if she is in fact unable to disagree, such as might happen if she is asleep at the time.

Therefore I suggest that you never allow yourself to fall asleep. Of course this might present difficulties if you work, drive, have children, occasionally like to go out of the house, breathe, etc., but that seems a small price to pay to keep your spouse from committing some truly heinous purchase.

Alternatively, you could use your spouse's own strategy -- that is, find a time to discuss the topic that is inopportune for him. I suggest waiting until he falls asleep. Then say, "Dear, I'm ready to discuss that Super Duty truck now...Dear?" The next time he brings up the topic, tell him you tried to talk to him about it and, since he made no response, you assumed the issue was dead. If he doubts your sincerity, have a tape recording ready of you asking the question and him snoring.

Neither solution will bring much equality to your discussion of important matters, but at least you won't unexpectedly find a monster truck in your driveway.