Q&A

As yet another project deadline looms over the Prissy Princess this week, she is expected to go into Full Stress Mode, wherein she runs around the house (or, given space constraints, one room) pulling her hair and wishing she had gone into some other line of work, such as Caretaker of Turtles. This will likely curtail her ability to write much for this blog. Therefore this week's blog episodes will be in the popular Q&A format, which allows the Princess to tackle important issues to readers without having to think much. You won't want to miss a single episode!

Q: Dear Prissy Princess,
My husband sometimes makes incomprehensible remarks, like "V[sub J] is not equal to Q[sub J] but is equal to Y[sub 3] [sub 564] [sub 893285XQV]." All this talk about subs makes me hungry, and so I say something in return about "the tandem rotation of X[sub or pizza?]." My husband does not appreciate this. He says that he is not talking to me and his comments don't require a response from me. How can I tell when I am supposed to give a response or not?
-Confused sub spouse

A: Dear [sub spouse],
This is common among spouses in "higher math." They forget that those of us who barely passed "lower math" have no idea what they are talking about. I suggest that you make your husband a sign that says "No response required" for him to hold up during these times when he is just talking to himself. This will greatly benefit both of you: You will not feel pressured into joining a conversation you have no hope of ever understanding, and he will not feel that he is constantly in the middle of a bad comedy show. Of course, you may continue to make funny remarks under your breath. If your husband asks what you said, say sweetly, "Oh, I was just talking to myself, dear."

One other helpful point: If what he is saying contains single letters, such as Q, X, and J, he probably is not talking to you, unless you are talking about buying new clothes and his response includes the letters N and O.