Tough times all over

It's been a little dry here lately. I was watering the flowers outside one day when I was accosted by one of the gerbera daisies. "You," it said, grabbing me around the neck with its long stem and dragging me down til my face was an inch from the flower's center, "you, with the watering can. Ain't ya got a decent drink for folk? Where's the hose, the sprinkler?" It gestured around the garden with its limp green leaves. "What's a flower gotta do to get a respectable bit of food and drink around here? We ain't seen rain in weeks, and you come with a miserly little watering can!"

I apologized for the inadequate water supply and explained that we had no spigot to which we could hook up a hose.

"Oh," the gerbera said. "Well, Daisy, there, you know she don't like this dry, wet, dry, wet business...kinda ruins her complexion, you know?"

I turned my head as much as I could -- the plant still had a good hold on my neck -- and looked at the delicate white gerbera next to him. I agreed that she was looking a bit peaked. I turned back and looked pointedly at the stem wound around my neck.

Daisy's protector abruptly let go. "Sorry about the roughing up," it said, patting me on the back to show it harbored no ill will. "I was just, you know, a little concerned about the situation. Hope I didn't hurt ya too much."

I refrained from rubbing my neck and assured the plant that no permanent damage had been done.

"Well, I guess it's hard times for everyone these days," it sighed.

I agreed, and said that I would try to make sure I watered Daisy more consistently. Daisy perked up a bit.

"Well, now, we'd mightily appreciate that," the gerbera said. "Course, I wouldn't want to take any refreshment away from all these other good folk here in the garden." He looked around, and here and there another flower nodded in agreement.

After saying my farewells I rushed into the house to call Joe at work. "You won't believe what just happened," I said.

"I can't talk right now, love," he said. "There's some emergency here...Mike was walking into work this morning and was grabbed and dragged by some plant at the entrance to the building. We gotta take him to emergency..."

I hung up and called Home Depot. "Yes, I'm looking for a watering can with a very long nozzle, say, from here to Texas...?"