Does not compute

The Princess (and sometimes Purveyor of Fine Art) wishes to announce a stunning addition to the castle's art collection, which was discussed previously in this blog. It has been determined, upon expert examination, that a wood rafter in their basement somehow escaped any shaping tools and remains in its natural loglike state, rounded and with bark still on it. The Hero and Princess are delighted with this discovery, and are already making plans to include special mention of it in their open houses, and perhaps a special fee as well.

As exciting as that discovery has been, we must occasionally return to the real world, and discuss actual, serious issues. Such an issue has recently occurred in my position as editor, despite my best efforts to avoid issues of a serious nature at work.

In reviewing an eighth-grade math test, I came across some word problems. A key feature of word problems, you will doubtless remember from your own student days, is that they provide extraneous information, which you do not need in order to solve the problem, and -- at least it always seemed this way to me -- not enough information to solve the problem, such as access to the answer.

This particular test that we give to eighth-graders contains two problems that clearly require much more information to answer. Perhaps eighth-graders would be able to solve the problems as stated. Adults, however, who have spent considerably more time in the real world, many without meaning to, are likely to have quite different answers, examples of which are given here.

Problem 1: Samantha is going shopping. She would like to spend no more than $85. She buys a book for $15, a video game for $22, and a CD for $16. She finds some shorts she really likes for $13.50 a pair. How many pairs of shorts can she buy?

Answer: First, what traumatic events have convinced Samantha that she "would like to spend no more than $85"? This is not a typical female emotion. It must be concluded that somewhere behind this irrational thought is a male.

Second, Samantha is obviously an adolescent, as shown by her ability to "find some shorts she really likes." No female over the age of 19 has experienced this sort of shopping occurrence. This may have nothing to do with the problem, but why set up a significant part of the student population to face a math problem that will in no way resemble their future life?

Problem 2: At the home improvement store, Al bought a hammer for $14 and nails for $6 per box. Al spent $68. How many boxes of nails did he buy?

Answer: Clearly there are some missing factors that could affect the outcome of this problem. Did Al buy anything ELSE that he did not need, such as a new Amazing Saw of Death, because he wants to have cooler tools than his neighbor? Was there a food truck parked outside the entrance to the store whose hot dog aroma Al could not resist? Or did Al perhaps -- as one of our acquaintances did -- see a ferret for sale and decide he needed to bring that home as well?

As you can see, our adult experiences have given us a unique perspective on tricky word problems. And now if you'll excuse me, I would like to go "spend more than $85."