The lazy commuter

After almost a week on the new job, I have quickly mastered the train and subway systems on my way to and from work, "mastery" being measured by the fact that I have not yet gotten on a vehicle going in the wrong direction. But give me time.


I have settled into a familiar, if not yet comfortable, routine, consisting of the following alternating states: freezing, thawing, freezing, thawing, freezing, thawing, etc. The freezing state occurs while dashing to and from -- or waiting for -- various modes of transportation, car, train, subway, camel caravan, etc. The thawing state, which mysteriously lasts a much shorter time than the freezing state, occurs during the last 20 seconds of time spent on one of the various modes of transportation, and then it is time to freeze again.


My new co-workers are disturbed by my long commute and the many transfer points it involves. They helpfully suggest other methods of getting to work, some of which involve more walking, which I strenuously object to on the grounds that I am lazy.


But, they suggest, in the warmer weather a longer walk in the beautiful outdoors wouldn't be a bad thing. They have a point: Instead of alternating between freezing and thawing states, I would have just one constant state: sweating.


Some people enjoy a brisk walk, and why not? Their skin sparkles with a healthy glow, and they feel energized and ready to take on the day. When I briskly walk -- say, from the refrigerator to the kitchen table -- all color drains from other parts of my face and congregates in my nose, giving me a striking resemblance to a certain famous reindeer. I feel ready to take on a nap.


So no, more walking during my commute is not for me. Now a chair sedan, that would be perfect. Wonder if my commuter vouchers would cover one of those...